In my couple of decades in leadership and leadership development, I’ve seen many leaders, myself included, avoid having tough conversations, especially with people behaving badly.

There are, of course, many reasons we hold back – the fear of conflict, the discomfort that comes with addressing an issue head-on, and simply not wanting to deal with the fallout.

But more often than not, especially if you’re in a leadership role, it’s about fearing loss – losing someone that has knowledge or losing that resource you need for things to keep ticking over.

And let’s not forget the time and effort we know it will take to replace them.

But if you give into these fears, you risk losing a whole lot more. Things like:

• Your credibility. Your team will notice what you tolerate, even if they don’t say it out loud.
• Your confidence. Every time you avoid the issue, you chip away at your belief in your own ability to lead.
• Your energy. Avoidance is draining. It takes more out of you than the conversation ever will.

Not to mention your sanity, because unproductive actions and poor attitudes rarely go away unless addressed.

So, what do you do when you find yourself here? How do you make the shift?

Start by asking yourself:

• What’s it really costing you?
• What’s at stake if nothing changes?
• And when’s the best time to act?

Then follow through.

Ask someone you trust to hold you to account so you actually do something about it. Things only shift when we combine awareness with brave action.

And here’s one more question worth asking:

• If they resigned tomorrow, what would you do?

Chances are, you’d find a way.

Don’t let people in your team hold you hostage because of their results or expertise.

Until next week — be well and lead well,

Kylie